Poison & Wine
by Rathias
Summary: After the War, the Wizarding World returns to normal.. but for two friends, words unspoken are causing tension. With the last year of Hogwarts being played out, will those truly destined to be with one another... finally come together?
1. Chapter 1 - Preclude

**A/N: Hello everyone! So like I promised, I said I would write another story once more in the Harry Potter 'verse, this time much better prepared than my last fanfiction "Grass, Parchment, and Toothpaste". This first chapter is an introduction, no real plot revelations in this one of anything, just a bit of writing to get the overall mood of our two characters out there. I will say, I did pull some paragraphs from my previous fiction into this one near the ending, as I felt they would fit.**

**Hope you enjoy!**

**-Rathias**

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**_The Dance_**

The song was over and the dancing ceased. Her eyes, full of joy and lighting up with thoughts of a happier time, returned to their glassy state as the realization of their situation came back to her. Her brow furrowed in worry as she slowly turned and walked back to the radio, sitting down on the bed next to it, hugging her knees to her chest.

All he could do was stare, as his heart was breaking for his best friend. He felt like there was nothing he could do, nothing to change how she was feeling, to bring her back to happier thoughts. He felt like nothing. He stared down at his feet as he shuffled his way out of the tent and into the night, walking a few yards out into the night.

The fog of his breathe reminded him quickly how cold it was. He blew into his cupped hands, trying to keep them warm as a shiver went down his spine. Why couldn't he do anything to make her happy? He wished Ron was here, he knew how to make her smile. He would do anything to make her smile right now, to keep her smiling. She had sacrificed so much already because of their friendship, and yet, there was nothing he could give her in return to make up for it.

He couldn't even make her smile.

He let out a sigh as he walked further into the forest, his thoughts solely on the woman back in the tent listening to the radio for names of those close to her.

**-X-**

She watched him step outside of the tent, knowing what was going through his head. She knew he was upset that she was sad again. She wished she could break this mood that was over her, and the dance they had just shared had done enough to pull her from these dark thoughts for a brief respite. But then they came rushing back once the song had finished, and instead of thinking about nothing but how he felt pressed against her as they rocked back in forth with the beat, she thought of all of those fighting to buy them time.

She rested her face on her knees, shutting out the sounds of the radio as she thought about the dance they had just shared. The way his hands had fit perfectly into her's, how when he moved his to her back, it felt perfect. The way he smiled at her as they spun in circles, sharing in laughter at how awkwardly ridiculous they must have looked. She was hesitant to even do it at first, she was wretched at dancing, but when he tugged her hand, his eyes smiling as if to say, 'Come on, who cares? Let's just do it anyway', she couldn't help but to oblige.

She would do anything for the man who had just walked out of the tent. She had given up her family for him, though she hided behind the guise of doing it for protecting her family, deep down she knew it was because she wanted to give herself totally to his quest to stop Voldemort, to help him see it through, to be with him every single step of the way.

She would see him happy. No matter what the cost.

**-X-**

**_The Battle_**

Harry was breathing heavily. His mind was spinning with the sudden rush of new information regarding his… well, whole life. As he turned around the corner, he saw them sitting there at the bottom of the steps. A couple of… oh, Ron… and Hermione. His heart skipped a beat and a sudden but brief rush of jealousy came over him as he saw the scene. He shook his head, shaking the thoughts out of his mind and returning to watching his two best friends finding comfort in one another.

But the pain was still there, the hurt was still present. She deserved better than him. He could never be her equal. He wasn't smart enough, strong enough… he had spent the majority of the time they had been friends doing nothing more than belittle her for the stupidest things… such as succeeding where he had failed. Why was she with him? What did she see in him that she couldn't see in Harry? Ever since that night in the tent… ever since that dance… he had been unable to get Hermione off of his mind. He never thought he would think of her as more than a friend, a sister even, but that night had showed him something more. Something deeper. Something… well, one sided. She didn't love him.. she loved Ron.

Ron.

His supposed best friend. The man who was supposed to have his back through everything that had happened over the years. But ever since his name came out of the Goblet of Fire in their fourth year, Harry began noticing his jealousy towards him. Ron envied him for everything that he had… popularity, money… and yet here was Harry, envying him for the one thing he wanted most…

Harry shook his head again, what the hell is he thinking about… now is NOT the time. He took a step down the stairs, towards the two of them, thinking in his head on how he was going to break the news to them about how he was destined to go be lopped off by the man he was supposed to stop this whole time.

Ironic how things work out.

**-X-**

She sat there on the steps with Ron next to her, his arm around her waist as his other hand played with her's, intertwining themselves in her own fingers. It didn't feel right, as much as she tried to make it seem so. They just didn't fit. They felt… wrong. She let out a small sigh.

"Are you okay?" Ron asked quietly, looking up at her, sensing her troubled thoughts. It was good he couldn't actually read her thoughts, or else he wouldn't have been so proper.

"Yeah, I'm just worried about Harry. He has been gone for awhile now.. maybe I should go," she moved to get up, but his hand gripped a bit tighter on her's. She flashed him a quick look of anger. How dare he try and stop her from going to see him? How da-

She heard a shuffle behind them, turning and finding herself staring up into those emerald green eyes. His eyes. The eyes that in her times of turmoil brought her comfort. He slowly walked down towards them both.

"Where have you been?"

"I'm going there now."

Her heart instantly shattered. She knew why he was going. She had figured it out a long time ago, but she wasn't absolutely positive until this very moment. She wanted to reach out to him, hold him, and tell him that it would be okay. But she couldn't. Instead, she tried to hold back the tears that were welling up quicker than she could stop them.

"Are you mad?" Ron asked, "No… you can't give yourself up to him." Bless his heart, she thought. Maybe Harry will listen to him and they'll find another way… Please listen, Harry, please…

But he kept walking towards the next flight of stairs, his back still towards them. Finally stopping at the first step, he turned, staring at his feet, "There is a reason I can hear them.. the horcruxes. I think I've known for awhile…"

His eyes came up and locked with hers, "And I think you've known too."

She could see the pain behind them. The silent prayer for another answer that he knew wasn't there, but was grasping to like straws. She stepped forward, doing what she knew she could do best and hopefully give him courage, "I'll go with you…"

"No."

She stopped dead in her tracks and all the defenses came down, all her resistance towards letting herself cry broke apart and the tears rolled freely down her cheek. He was speaking again, but she couldn't hear him. All she could hear was the loud beating of her own heart. He was mid-sentence when she interrupted him, closing the gap in a single stride and embracing him in a deep hug.

'Say it Hermione, just say it. Ron can sod off, just say the words…'

He gently let go of her, giving her one last smile.. his smile, his perfect smile.. the one he reserved only for her.. before turning around and walking down the steps towards his fate.

**-X-**

**_The Forest _**

As he walked through the Forbidden Forest, the invisibility cloak wrapped tightly around him, he found it curious how quickly he had come to terms with his own death. He wondered if those who had given their own life in his defense had ever gotten the chance. Remus. Tonks. Sirius. Father. Mother. Did they get this opportunity? To stare death in the face and tell him that they were not afraid?

He heard the snap of a twig and low voices talking. One of them sounded familiar… Yaxley, he believed. He knew he was getting closer and closer to his final encounter with Voldemort. His mind once again strayed to his own thoughts, this time of his friends. Of Neville, Luna, Cho, Oliver, Fred, George, Ron…. Hermione.

Out of them all, he would miss her the most. Her constant nagging about paying attention during their studies or completing their homework on time had become such a constant in his life that he regretted now taking for advantage the short time he had had with her. She was a reminder of the simpler joys in life. She had protected him from the horrors of the real world, taking on such a heavy burden, but she did it with stride. She was so strong. Stronger than he thought anyone really knew besides him.

In his darkest hours, she had been his beacon of hope. She had been there refusing to let him give up when every fiber of Harry screamed that he had every right to.

He would miss her so much.

For the first time since he stepped out of the gates of Hogwarts and into the darkness of the forest did he begin to question what it was that he was about to do.

He loved her. Loved her more than anything else in this world and in his final moments with her, he could not gather up the courage to tell her. He had faced Voldemort countless times, slew a basilisk, challenged a horde of dementors.. and yet, saying three simple words to someone he cared so deeply for was the hardest thing he had ever considered doing in his life.

His head hanged a little lower as he picked up his pace, walking further and further into the forest, until finally breaking the tree line and coming upon a clearing deep in the forest, where his mortal enemy and his soldiers were waiting.

"It seems," he could see Voldemort addressing the Death Eaters that surrounded him, "… that I was mistaken."

He took a deep breath, and removed the cloak from around him, "You weren't."

"HARRY! NO!" He could hear Hagrid yell before one of the Death Eaters hit him brutally and told him to be quiet. But that was not his pivotal focus right now. His one focus was the man standing in front of him, the man who had committed so many atrocities and caused Harry so many years of pain.

A smirk appeared on the face of his enemy as his head tilted sideways, "Harry Potter…"

… The boy who lived."

It was in those next moments that everything moved in slow motion. Voldemort had not wasted a minute to finally strike down his young foe. His arm lashed back as his mouth began to form the words that Harry knew would be coming.

But his mind was not in the moment. His mind was rushing through 7 years of memories, to every single moment he had held her in his arms, or just held her hand. He imagined how he felt every time it happened. How comfortable he felt in those moments, how peaceful he was. He imagined that was what death was like. Peaceful. Quiet. He would see her there one day and maybe.. maybe then he could tell her.

He would tell her that in those final moments of life… he wasn't thinking about horcruxes, he wasn't thinking about Hogwarts, or anything else but her. He was imagining how he hoped that his sacrifice would mean a happy, quiet life for her. A life where she could have a family, could find happiness. Maybe it would be with Ron, maybe it would be with someone else.

But as long as she was happy… then this sacrifice was worth making.


	2. Chapter 2 - Diagon Alley

Harry tossed the few sickles he owed onto the counter, giving Tom a small nod as he accepted the lukewarm coffee into his hand. He had been late waking up this morning, something that rarely ever happened, and missed out on the best of part his normal morning routine - Tom's Hazelnut and Mint coffee brew. Harry cursed at himself as he took a small sip, saddened by how the world could punish him for missing his alarm in such a way. Don't get him wrong, the coffee was still outstanding, but nothing quite compared to the kick a nice hot cup of brew could wake you up in the early hours. Never again, Harry thought, making a mental note to find a better alarm as he stepped out into Diagon Alley, sipping casually on his drink. He tapped the stone wall in the precise order, and casually watched as the bricks moved, revealing to him a long road full of magical shops, and an increased abundance of witches and wizards.

He looked down at his watch. July 30th. Interesting. If he recalled right, tomorrow would be the deadline for the children to give their response to the school. Normally, everyone would wait until around the end of August to purchase their supplies, but maybe this year was different. Maybe in the aftermath of the war, many were excited to see their friends once more after a summer of celebration, or maybe those newly entering the school are in a rush to become a part of its history. A smile appeared on his face as he watched the hustle and bustle, stepping through the archway and down the road towards the white marble building which housed his destination - Gringotts.

His purpose here today was to secure a loan from Gringotts. Weird, he knew, for a rich wizard such as himself to do a thing… but to him it represented something normal, something he desired so much. He knew he had the money to buy whatever he wanted up front, but he wanted to feel like another ordinary wizard, with bills and whatnot. It sounded strange, truthfully, wizards and mortgages, but to Harry it sounded brilliant. A new constant in his life where before there was nothing but unknowns. He had a small chuckle to himself as he thought about it, before he found himself in front of a small child staring up at him.

"E-e-excuse me, sir, but may we have your a-autograph?" said the small sandy haired boy with bright blue eyes. He couldn't be any older than 8, yet there he was standing before Harry with a small book and quill in his hands. He smiled down at the boy as he kneeled down, setting his coffee on the ground next to him, before taking the book and writing his name with a flourish inside.

"Here you go, lad," he said with a smile as he returned the book to the child. He ran away with such pure delight that Harry couldn't help but laugh. They were what made all the fame bearable, the children. The adults who adored him kind of put him off, but the little kids, so full of life and hope, they made the amount of spotlight that had been put on his head lately quite bearable. For they have a bright future, a future without Voldemort, without uncertainty. He envied them for that. He wished he could have grown up without so much responsibility thrusted upon him at such a young age, but in hindsight, if it wasn't for everything he had gone through, he probably would not be the man he is today.. and he's pretty proud of who he was.

"'Ello Harry!"

"Bloody hell, it's Harry Potter!"

"Harry Potter! Good morning to you!"

More peopled cried out to him from inside shops or just passing by him on the street as he stood back up, taking another drink from his coffee. He waved back at them with a smile, but after awhile he began his journey again towards Gringotts, every now and then sparing a glance towards shops that had yet to reopen or others still under reconstruction.

The war ended only a few months ago, but still to this day there are repairs being made. To homes, businesses, and to the government as well. Kingsley Shacklebolt stepped into the Minister position with a unanimous vote, and since then, he had done everything in his power to prevent another Voldemort from happening. Increasing awareness of the dark arts and helping the education committee finalize a brand new Defense Against curriculum, which would be introduced this year at Hogwarts. He even rebuilt the Auror Department from the ground up, offering the position of Head Auror to Harry shortly after he took office. Harry had politely declined, but told him that maybe he would take him up on his offer further down the road. For now though… Harry needed to sort out his life first. Figure out who he was now that he had no prophecy to fulfill.

And the first step in that long road was to find a home. He had considered returning to his parent's old manor in Godric's Hollow, but instead allowed the Ministry of Magic to turn it into a monument in honor of those lose in the war. He didn't think he could live there anyways, too many… or too few… memories of the place brought him nothing but sorrow.

Instead, he found a piece of land on Iona, a small island on the western coast of Scotland, that he found very desirable, and elected to build a house upon it. He had used his own money to cover the cost of the land as well as construction, but when it came to actually financing the house, well.. he decided to go old school and speak to Gringott's. As he stood on the steps of the bank door, he took one last long gulp of coffee before tossing it into a bin, and walking into the goblin bank.

**-X-**

Hermione Granger stood in Flourish & Botts, going once more over her 7th year book list and making sure she had everything she would need for her final year at Hogwarts. She had decided, at the end of the War, that she would return to complete her studies. Many of her fellow students had already graduated, such as Neville Longbottom, who was now working at the Ministry as an Auror, in honor of his parents. Rumor had it, however, that he was recently offered the position of Herbology Professor next year when Professor Sprout retired. She had heard that from Hannah Abbott, another student from her year who was planning on returning to Hogwarts as well, and who had recently begun dating Neville. Hermione had a small laugh at the thought of what if Neville had gotten the job THIS year. Her a student to him? She wondered how the poor man would act in that position. She loved Neville as much as she assumed she would love her brother, if she had one, and silently wished him well in whatever he was up to this day.

She handed the clerk the necessary amount to pay for the books with a smile, before heading outside, into the hot British sun. There was a hustle and bustle in the streets of Diagon Alley. A small sandy haired boy was showing his mother his notebook with such a glee that it warmed Hermione's heart. Many of the other families had decided to come early, like her, to pick up the necessary supplies for the coming year. She was absolutely excited to go back.. to see the old halls once more in their purpose of higher magical education, and not in the grim defense of many innocent lives. She knew part of her would be sad at returning, the memories she had of the place were both brilliant and frightful. When she found out a lot of other people would be doing the same as her, returning to finish their education, it helped ease her mind of the thoughts. Being able to see her friends like Dean Thomas would make being a year older than the next class a bit bearable. She was excited to a quidditch match again too, but part of her knew it would bring her nothing but sadness when she ultimately realize that she was no longer there cheering for her two best friends, Harry and Ron. Ron, instead, had decided to forego his last year at Hogwarts, instead taking the Minister of Magic up on his offer to allow all participants of the Battle a job with the Aurors. And then Harry…. Well, Harry…

She paused and thought about it for a long moment. She didn't know what Harry was up to, or truthfully, where he even was. He had, in all, disappeared at the conclusion of the War. She knew he allowed the Ministry to turn his parent's old home into a monument, but he wasn't even present at the ceremony according to Ron. (She herself missed the ceremony due to her trip to Australia). She missed Harry dearly, of course, and it was also her fault that they hadn't kept in touch. A week after the end of the Battle, she was on a plane ride heading to Australia to recover her parents. The whole trip had taken roughly a month, and when she returned, she was so preoccupied with trying to set her parents up in a nice flat in London that she had completely forgotten about anything else. In fact, if it hadn't been for running into Hannah at the Leaky Cauldron today, she wouldn't have even learned about Neville. She had kept in touch with Ron over the course of her time in another country, but the letters slowly waned and soon she felt like they were drifting apart, something in which both her and Ron agreed upon. They had split mutually around mid-July, and now keep in contact as much as they did during her trip. Rarely.

To be honest, she never thought she'd see herself going the long distance with Ron. Maybe a small fling of some sort, but after closely analyzing their whole relationship one afternoon during her trip did she realize that she only clung to him because the one she truly desired was too far off for her to really connect with. Plus, it didn't help that he had his eyes on two of the prettiest girls in school at the time, and who was she to compete with Ginny and Cho?

She cursed at herself for not doing more to keep in touch with Harry. She owed him that much after all they went through together. With a sigh, she walked, bags in tow, towards the Leaky Cauldron, promising to herself that as soon as she got home, she would write him a letter.

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**A/N Curious as to what you all think about Wizards and mortgages, haha. Please review! All criticism is welcome and encouraged!**


	3. Chapter 3 - Harry I

Harry stepped out of Gringotts, especially pleased with himself with how his business with the bank just went. Everything had gone a lot smoother than he had expected, and a lot quicker to, leaving him the rest of the day to do whatever he desired. He thought about maybe emulating the rest of the families that had showed up to the Alley today, and pick up his school supplies. He had decided over the summer, while searching for his own place to live, that he would return to Hogwarts for his final year while his house was under construction. So, he wrote an owl to the newly appointed Headmistress, Professor McGonagall, and asked if it was possible. Her jubilant response gave him his answer. He was happy to be returning, truthfully, and maybe he might even play quidditch again… but it was too soon to tell. Without a care in the world and a pep in his step, he began walking down Diagon Alley, and back towards Flourish and Botts. His journey was interrupted, however, by someone he wasn't expecting.

"Harry?" said a familiar voice behind him. He turned to find an old friend from Hogwarts standing before him, bags in her hands filled with supplies for her final year at the school.

"Hannah!" A smile came to his face, "How have you been?"

They shared a hug before Hannah pulled away, wiping her blonde hair out her face, and returning his smile, "I've been great! How have you been? My, it feels like its been ages since I last saw you!"

He made an apologetic face, "Well, I kind of disappeared after the War. I went to France to bring my Aunt and Uncle back into the country. Been spending the past few months trying to help them move back into Surrey. Once that was said and done, decided to find my own place to live," he nodded his head towards Gringotts, "Just finished securing the finances for it, actually."

Hannah was beaming, "That's great news, Harry. I'm glad things are finally starting to turn to normal for you. If anyone deserves that, it's you."

"Thank you," he said, "Well, what about you?"

"Well," she said, a small blush coming to her face, "I'm dating Neville now, for one.."

"Neville? That's great! How is that going?"

"Really, really good," she readjusted the bags in her hand, a smile stretching from ear to ear, "He's been amazing to me, honestly, and really supportive of my decision to go back to Hogwarts this year to finish up."

"You too?" He said, raising a brow, "I thought I would be the only one!"

They shared in a chuckle before Hannah shook her head, "Oh no, a lot of us are going!" Her eyes went up, as if she was looking at a list in the sky, trying to remember who all was going back, "Dean Thomas is going back, it took a bit of convincing from me but I managed to talk him into it. Uhm, Terry Boot is as well, do you remember him? Justin Finch-Fletchly was planning on returning, but he decided to move with his parents over to the United States. And then… oh! Hermione is going back as well! I just saw her an hour or so ago at the Cauldron.. And then there's.."

Her voice trailed off in Harry's mind as he tensed up. Hermione was going back to school? Idiot, Harry, of course she would return. If anyone would have returned, it definitely would have been her. He hadn't spoken to her since the end of the War, something he wasn't quite sure how he felt about. 'I mean, I was really busy, and I'm sure she was too,' he thought, trying to convince himself that his lack of communication with one of the most important people in his life was acceptable. On one hand, it had been easy trying to just ignore his feelings that he had for her, since he wasn't around her every day now… but on the other side, he realized just how much he had missed her.

He wondered if Ron and her were still together. How would he deal with being around her now that everything was over? Would it be weird being around the girl he cared about but his best friend was snogging? Even after all of these months, he still felt the same for her, if not more. Those moments in the Forbidden Forest were as vivid in his mind as ever. It might be sad, but every now and then he got this stupid idea in his head that life would be easier if he hadn't survived Voldermort's curse… but then again, he'd be dead. He wouldn't be caring about anything.

"… And then there's Ginny, but she's not really 'returning' per say she's just normally in her last year, and that's about all I can think of right now," she said, bringing Harry back into the present. He had completely forgotten about Ginny Weasley,not to her discredit at all. They talked a little while after the Battle was over, but Harry was too preoccupied with the caring of the wounded to actually pay attention. He recalled her saying something about how sorry she was for all they went through together, then something about her and Dean Thomas. Truthfully, he wasn't at all upset at what happened. He had stopped thinking about her shortly into the search for the Horcruxes, and afterwards, Harry thought that they wouldn't really make a good couple. Ginny lived for excitement, thrived on it really, but nowadays Harry didn't want anything to do with the word. He wanted normal. He wanted peace. He wanted to go a whole year in his life again without someone wanting him dead. Ginny didn't want that kind of life and he knew it. He would have brought her nothing but sadness had they stayed together.

"Wait a minute," Hannah said, pausing and raising her brow mischievously, "Isn't today the 30th? Tomorrow is your birthday isn't it?"

Oh no.

"Uh," he ran his hand through his hair, "Uh.."

She looked at him pointingly, "Don't try to get out of it, Harry Potter, it is your birthday isn't it! I know you and Neville share it. That's perfect! We're throwing a party tomorrow at his grandmother's place! You should come! I'll talk to him and we'll make it a double celebration! That'd be brilliant! How does that sound?"

A clock tower rang in the distance, signaling it to be 11 o'clock in the morning. Before Harry could respond, a look of worry came across Hannah's face.

"Oops! I'm late for lunch with him now! Expect an owl, Harry, it was great to see you again! See you tomorrow!"

Harry just stood there, unsure of what just happened, as Hannah waved goodbye to him and went on her merry way towards the cauldron. A birthday party. Great. Just what he needed.

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**A/N If anyone is wondering where the title of this fanfiction came from, look up "Poison & Wine" by the Civil Wars on Youtube. **


	4. Chapter 4 - Pre-party Thoughts

**A/N Thank you very much for your continued support during the writing of this. Please remember to review and provide critique as it is very helpful to me. Enjoy!**

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There was an overcast in London today. An expected storm from the east had brought with it a cool breeze, which helped Hermione as she finished up her morning run, and using a parking meter, began stretching. The cold wind kissed the sweat on her skin, sending a small shiver down her spine as she pulled her foot up to her butt, stretching her aching quads. The rain had just began to slightly come down a few moments ago, as she turned the last corner that would lead to her parent's apartment building, and the longer she spent stretching, the more she told herself to pull the keys out of her pocket and spend the inevitable minutes fumbling with them to get them to work. Running had become a habit she picked up during her trip to Australia, as her mother (in her altered alias of Mrs. Wendell) found it to be a very good way to clear one's head from nonsense and stress, and when her memories had returned to her, she saw no reason to stop. And so, begrudgingly at first, Hermione had begun to join her on her morning exercises. When they moved to London, however, Mrs. Granger ended up dropping the habit, stating that the up tempo from reestablishing the family practice, added on top of the stress from settling into a new place, had taken up all of her free time… and that she promised she would return to it within a month or so of being back. Hermione had just kept going, ironically, instead doing the runs by herself in the morning and using the time to just enjoy the scenery that was London. It had been a long time since she had just visited the city, and the last time she was here, She had Ron and Harry in tow as they fled from Death Eaters.

Speaking of Harry, she thought as she finally unlocked the deadbolt to the door and stepped inside, she had left a barely written letter on her desk last night. She had every intention of finishing the night before, going so far as to pour herself a bottle of cabernet to mull over as she thought about what she would write, but she found that as soon as she finished penning _'Dear Harry,' _that she was in the precarious position. She had no idea what she wanted to tell him. Of course, there was the trip to Australia, as well as her decision to return to Hogwarts for her final year, and asking for forgiveness on why she hadn't written him in so long.. or talked to him in so long.. or even thought about him in so long. The more she thought about it, the more depressed she got over the realization that she had been a horrible friend over the past months, especially considering all that Harry must be going through right now with the War over and no one really being 'there' for him during it all. She didn't blame him for disappearing. She would have wanted to as well. But everything she had wanted to say in the letter, she felt it was more important to tell him in person. It seemed so impolite to just casually mention in a letter _'Welp! My bad for not writing you! Was a wee bit busy!' _He would understand of course, she knew he would, but that didn't make it right.

As she reached the guest room, which for the present she called her own, she pulled off her shirt, laden with sweat, and threw it into the hamper as she walked over to her desk and stared down at her failed attempt of a letter, contemplating over her options of what her next step should be. She could always telly him, maybe that would be appropriate. But then she realized that he probably wouldn't have a phone and even if he did… what was his number?

'Ugh!' she thought as she turned and began walking towards the shower, upset at her indecision. She was halfway through taking off her sports bra when a tap came at her window. She turned quickly, covering her chest with her arms as blood quickly rushed to her cheeks, thinking someone had been a peeping tom, but relief came instantly when she saw that it was instead an owl pecking at her window, a small letter attached to his leg. She sighed, pulled her bra back down, and walked over to the window, ruffling the owl's feathers a little as she pulled the letter from his leg. Inquisitively, she opened the letter;

_Hermione,_

_You'll never believe who I saw in Diagon Alley this morning! Harry! Can you believe that?! Apparently after the War, he disappeared to France to find his old family, and brought them back to England! Explained where he's been the past few months huh? Well anyways, we chatted for a little while outside of Gringotts and he's going to be coming to Neville's party tonight - well, both of their parties tonight as they have the same birthday! I spoke to Neville about having them celebrate together and he agreed! Brilliant, right?! Everyone's invited and you should definitely come, it'd be great to have everyone together again! I have other great news too but if I tell you now, what would I have to talk about at the party?_

_Owl me back and let me know!_

_Much love,_

_Hannah_

Hermione quickly grabbed a piece of parchment from her desk and responded simply with;

_Hannah,_

_I'll be there._

_Hermione._

She quickly attached it to the owl's leg and sent him off. This was brilliant! This solved everything! Now she could talk to her Harry in person and apologize about the past few months! But more importantly, she would get to see him again! Her girly nature took over as, with a new spring in her step, she walked to the shower, with thoughts of what she was going to wear to the party.

**-X-**

Harry inspected himself in the mirror, unsure of how well he could pull off a slate suit and a black tie. He had worn plenty of suits before, of course, but he never quite found the ordeal to be a pleasant experience. It was always itchy, right in the middle of the shoulder blades where no matter how far he stretched, he could never quite reach it. It was always tight around the neck, making him feel as if he was constantly choking, but only slightly, and turning his head became a chore. It, eventually as the night passed, became quite hot, too. Maybe he wasn't made to wear suits. Maybe his upbringing taught him that loose clothing and baggy pants were what he was destined to wear. Or maybe he just had a really bad tailor. Either way, he wasn't even sure if he should wear a suit… Hannah had failed to mention the level of formality that the party was going to be.

Wait a minute… how formal could it be? They were turning eighteen, for pete's sake. It was a bit much to expect them to dress as if they were going to a ball. He ripped the tie from his neck, throwing it onto the floor next to his bed as he sat down with a huff.

He sat alone in an empty apartment in London that he decided to rent out for the rest of the summer, deciding against living with Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon, as he only hoped for them to live out the rest of their lives in peace. Normality. Something he now envied of them, but not to the degree in which they so drastically grasped for their whole lives, just a normal.. well, normal. Dudley, to his surprise, had understood when they talked about it, and that was the beginning of an interesting relationship that developed over the summer with his cousin. They would soon find themselves staying up at night talking amongst each other over the years they spent together, with Harry telling him about the prophecy, and the War, and all the friends he lost. When he stopped talking, he looked over to find Dudley crying, and it surprised him. When he asked why, his cousin could only say that he was sorry he didn't treat him better, and that he would try to be a better cousin and a better friend from now. Harry didn't sleep that night, the whole thing coming as a shock to him. Maybe Dudley and him could have a normal relationship, maybe one day they could make up for all the hatred between their families.

Maybe.

But for now, as he listened to the sounds of cars going through their evening ordeal of going home, with horns honking and pedestrians screaming at taxis that almost hit them, the famous Harry Potter couldn't even decide what to wear to a teenage party where teenage people hung out and did teenage things. He felt an odd amount of pressure to impress, but deep down he knew why. Hermione would be there. And he wanted to look his absolute best for her, if for nothing else. He wondered if she knew he was coming, but if he knew Hannah as he thought he did… she would've invited her, and would've told her about running into him in Diagon Alley… and wouldn't be content with Hermione until she had agreed to come. He began to think on how her and Neville had become a couple, considering the two weren't exactly a great match from the view of an outsider, but for some reason he just understood. Maybe that is how things work. Maybe those we don't expect to become the ones we love are the ones we end up loving the most.

Like how he was with Hermione.

His head ran through all sorts of scenarios on how they would greet each other once more. He thought of the awkward hello after so many months of not talking to one another, and the awkward moments that were bound to come when she would probably slow dance with Ron and he would be in a corner staring at her, wishing it was him instead. And then he would think of her in a way that would make him feel awkward, and eventually he would not want to be there, and then there would be the awkward goodbyes because he couldn't handle the pain anymore.

'And to think I'm some sort of legend…' He thought to himself with a laugh.

He pulled his coat off, then his shirt, then his pants, and he stared at himself in his underwear in the mirror, going through his head of the many different combinations of t-shirts and coats and pants and whatever he had in the suitcase that laid open on the ground behind him.

And then he thought… why am I even going?


	5. Chapter 5 - The Party

**A/N Firstly, I want to apologize for the length between posts - as well as the length OF this post. Military life is demanding and a lot of my time is spent prepping for my soon to be end of contract with them. It has been draining and has devoid me of all creativity recently. I had most of this chapter already written, but wanted to add more meat to it. I feel like 1,400 words per entry isn't a good number.. and I wanted more. But a mix of outside sources prevented anything from being created.**

**So I am going to post what I have in the hopes of keeping you, the readers, still aware that I am here. I am listening. And please, continue to review and provide feedback. Thank you.**

* * *

It had taken Harry's eyes awhile to adjust for the lack of light. The large, rustic study, which had been converted to the room party for everyone, was using only a single '80s disco ball, hanging from the high ceiling, to illuminate the room. Knowing Hannah, she probably had it in such a way to provide more 'ambiance' for their guests, but Harry knew it was more for concealing all the people snogging in the corners, when the liquid courage provided from the brandy smuggled into the party finally took hold its guests. It was like he imagined, Harry thought, and in some little way it gave him an inch of hope. It was exactly like a teenage party, in every sense of the word. Truthfully, the focus wasn't really on either him or Neville, but more on the fact that they gave everyone a reason to be together once more and celebrate something that for the last year most of them thought they might never see again - life. So instead of thinking of all the dark times and the close calls and the friends lost… they just thought about themselves, the empty glass of brandy in their hands and how it shouldn't be like that, and why this random girl was kissing that random guy and the gossip that would be shared in the morning.

Harry stood in the corner of the party, leaning into it as he watched everyone else talk about what they had been doing over the summer, or how they're parents were making a recovery at St. Mungo's, or for some how good it felt to be back in England in general after running away. Hannah had brought him in and was about to give him this grand introduction, flourish and all, when Neville intercepted her and lead him in through the back way, letting Harry do what he wanted to do most and just observe. Neville understood. Neville always understood. So while Harry too was supposed to be celebrating his birth, he instead wanted to allow everyone else to enjoy the moment, and Neville to be the center of attention for once.

He hated the fame that had been thrusted upon him when everyone had learned of all that he had done during the War. He had misplaced his hope when he had thought the media would instead focus on those who were hurt the most during it. That was part of the reason why he left for France in the first place. Not really just to find his family, but to escape the countless interviews that were bound to happen, and the countless attempts at people misconstruing his words to provide the most overwhelming (and more than likely largely untrue) outcome of events, garnering the greatest effect from its audience - and it sickened him. That is why he didn't show up to his parent's manor being christened into a memorial.

And so sipping on his cup in the corner of a dark room at a party that he still wasn't really sure he wanted to be at yet, Harry sat and thought. Neville came up to him a bit later, a wee bit tipsy from his sixth glass of brandy.

"'Ello Harry," he said, with a massive toothy grin on his face. He stumbled into the corner, right next to him.

"How ya been, Neville?"

"Good, good," he said, taking another small sip, "Really goooood… Can.. you's believe I'm datin' Hannoo Abboth now? Serioushly… me? Her? Pfft…"

Harry stifled a laugh at the ridiculous amount of slur in Neville's voice. He pat his good friend on the shoulder, "Anyone would be lucky to have you, Neville. You're a good man, and an even greater friend."

"Not.. qwuite as good ash you though, 'Arry.. not.."

And then he was gone, and crashing towards Harry as he blacked out. With a laugh, he caught his good friend and laid him down in a chair next to where they were sitting. He would've placed him on the couch, but it seems the opposite was already occupied by a couple. As he stood back up, after putting a pillow under Neville's head, he heard the room explode into applause. He turned his head towards the direction of the main door… and saw her.

It felt like ages had passed since the last time he saw her, but she hadn't changed one bit, at least he couldn't tell from underneath this lighting. But as a smile broke out on her face from the applause that greeted her, he felt his heart fleeting, and all the emotions he held for her came rushing back in a glorious instant. She was so beautiful.

Slowly, all the sounds in the room began to fade into nothing, and the only thing left was her. In all of her beauty. Her hips swayed gently as she walked through the front door. She wasn't wearing anything fancy, just a grey shirt that hung loosely on her shoulders, and a pair of worn denim jeans, but what she wore never comprised the beauty that was Hermione Granger. It was everything else about her.. her simplicity. From her bushy brown hair to her perfect lips. How everything just fit together on her body that caused Harry to lose his mind in pure bliss at the mere sight of her. Beautifully simple.

Hannah didn't introduce her with a flourish, because before Hannah could even speak, the rest of the party had raised their glasses in a roar, celebrating her for her part in the War. He watched as her beautiful face became suddenly pink with embarrassment, bringing her hands up to hush them before in turn thanking them for their kind words and their own bravery. Because truly, she said, had it not been for them standing up against the darkness, they never would have stood a chance. And so with a glass of her own, she countered their toast with one of her own, and they celebrated her even more. Harry couldn't help but smile.

Hannah whispered something in her ear, causing Hermione's face to brighten up, before she began searching left and right, her eyes trying to tear through the darkness for something, and he was hurt. She was looking for Ron, more than likely, which Harry realized he had yet to see at the party, but nonetheless, he let out a small sigh as he shuffled past a few partygoers, muttering an apology for bumping into them, before heading back out the door that Neville had shown him in through. He was halfway across the backyard, staring up into the night sky and thinking of where to apparate, when a soft voice called for him from behind.

"Harry?"

He would know that voice from anywhere. Melodic. Smooth. Beautiful. His body immediately tensed up. He wasn't expecting her to follow him. He turned slowly, staring at her and her brown eyes, and the smile that she reserved just for him appeared on her face. Within an instant, the distance was closed, and he found himself wrapped in her embrace - and everything felt right in the world. With an equal vigor, if not more, he returned the hug, but then he remembered and he pulled back.

"Where's Ron?" He asked, causing a confused look to replace the smile on her face.

"Ron?" A look of realization came over her, "Oh! He's at the Ministry tonight catching up on some paperwork. It's great to see you again!" She moved closer to him.

He shifted uneasily, "I'm alright, been busy running around with the old family. How about yourself?"

She smiled again, taking another step closer, "Great, great… I brought my family back from Australia. I would've owl'd you but I was so swamped with catching up with them and the whole move that I completely forgot… I'm so sorry, Harry."

He smiled back at her, waving her off, "It's fine. We're both guilty of not talking to one another."

She beamed, grabbing his hand and pulling him back towards the party, "Come on then, we have so much to catch up on.. and I don't want to waste an instant!"


End file.
